Dear Mr. President,
Dear Mr. President,
First off, I would like to say that I always supported your campaign. You stood for change, and was a beacon of hope when it came to the rebuilding of America.
However, with only one week in office, you have already delivered more fascism than the Patriot Act. First Sarah Palin was trying to tell me what I’m allowed to do with my uterus, and now you have banned torture in America. This is an outrage! Due to this totalitarian policy, I’m demanding an immediate refund on the following purchases I have made:
Rubber Ball Gag
$42.00
Wireless Vibrating Nipple Clamps
$32.00
Spiked Leather Choker
$28.50
Rubber Restraint Jacket
$698.00
Dog Face Hood w/ Blindfold
$348.00
Steel Handle Cock Whip
$46.00
Male Chastity Device
$240
TOTAL EXPECTED REFUND: $1434.50
Mr. President, I feel that it is my right, not only as an American, but as a human being to be bound, gagged, and flogged like the bad puppy that I am. I must add that if I do not receive this refund soon, I will be forced to deduct these expenses when filing my taxes this year. I appreciate your cooperation in this matter.
Thank You,
Ghansham a.k.a BriGuy
